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Porkins
"Velcro is my best friend."
-Jek Porkins

Jek Porkins was a Rebel pilot and a hero. He was often called "Piggy" by his fellow pilots, but never to his face.


Early Life

Jek Porkins came from the Inner Rim planet of Bestine IV. He was an expert T-16 pilot, and extremely popular in his school. Unfortunately, he suffered a serious leg and arm injury in a crash and had to sit in bed for months while he healed. Jek was horribly depressed. His then-girlfriend, South Bodine, tried to cheer Jek up with some ice cream and some hanky panky. Jek's cast was completely in the way though, and hanky panky just wasn't happening. A little upset, and needing to go hand herself, South took off and left Jek alone with his ice cream. That's how it started, and he never put the spoon down. Ice cream became his number one love, and finally South got sick of playing second fiddle and kicked rocks.


Middle Life

"I didn't always look this way..."

-Jek Porkins

The citizens of Bestine were uprooted and forced by the Empire to live as nomads. This is how many of them became some of the first to join the new Rebel Alliance. Jek tried hard to train with Wes Janson and get back into flying shape, but it was realized quickly that it was futile. This is just who Jek was, and he'd have to accept it. But the X-Wings seemed to have no trouble supporting his weight, and he amazed some of the commanders with how quickly he transitioned from T-16 to flying the starfighters. He was in.  The rebel technicians and maintenance crew would complain that they could never get the fat guy smell out of his cockpit, however.

Rebellion

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Jek flew on only a handful of missions for the Rebels, usually accompanying his new friend Wes. Jek was great with the Y-Wings, but always preferred the fast X-Wing.

Jek accompanied the Rebels to their new base on Yavin 4, being split up from Wes Janson who had another mission at the time. The other pilots were constantly pulling pranks on Jek, insisting it was just their way of making him feel like one of the guys. He was quick to point out though that none of the other guys had genitalia drawn on their faces. They also mercilessly teased him about his sleep apnea, and the fact that his X-Wing cockpit was filled with fast food wrappers and empty beer bottles.

The only other pilot at Yavin that was nice to Jek was a young man from Tatooine named Biggs Darklighter. He was constantly yanking "kick me" signs off Porkins' back, and the other pilots began harassing him as well.


But then it was time to get serious. Princess Leia arrived with the plans for the Empire's new Death Star, and the brass had found a weakness. They were suiting up, and going in.

The End

Jek was designated Red 6 during the Battle Of Yavin. He pitched a fit when he found out the new guy got to be Red 5. "I should be Red 5!"


Garven Dreis, who was Red Leader for this mission, told Jek, "Look, it's no secret that you are a fatty, okay? He's Red 5 because he weighs as much as ONE of your legs, so thus he's one less than you. Okay?"

Jek was quiet all the way to the Death Star, when Biggs got him to finally start some chatter. Darklighter also suggested taking out some aggression on those Imperials below them. Jek immediately saw the logic. Biggs then switched over so only Wedge Antilles could hear him, saying "Maybe he'll work off a calorie or two in the process."
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Unfortunately, it was in this battle that the other pilots pulled a prank that went too far. They'd convinced Luke that to be one of the hotshot pilots, he had to hide some simple firecrackers in Jek's cockpit. But these were cheap ones and melted due to the heat under Jek's chair. Not only had they quickly fused his ejector seat to the X-Wing, but the fluids had started to eat through the hull. When Jek noticed he was losing hull integrity, he tried to eject. His droid, R5-D8 was able to eject safely, though he was later killed in the explosion from the Death Star.

Biggs yelled at Jek to eject, but Jek was trying to wedge some In & Out wrappers into the hole that was forming on his floor. It was then that a TIE Fighter got a lucky shot and destroyer Red 6.

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